Log:Killing The Past 3: Gods of Scuffle

Set Fashion to Stun

OOC Date: July 26, 2018
Location: Big Hope Laundromat, Bestine
Participants: Defiance: Hex, Darius Wildes, Vasani, Dosk, Sajin, Kasia Ashkuri, ft. Zhu Yan as GM.

The short story: Kasia knows what kids want, Darius has a mean right-Houk, Dosk is double hand-icapped, Vasani isn't careful what she wishes for, Hex blows his top, Sajin blows his load.

The long story:

Bestine IV. The most beautiful dump in the galaxy. Formerly an idyllic ocean planet untouched by colonization, the Empire had come through and put bloody great big industry everywhere. Small industrial towns were dotted across the tiny continents, ferrying goods to and fro, generally serving as something of a hub for random jobs on the Mid Rim. And oddly enough, one of those jobs was laundry.
"It's an easy mission, ok ka?" said the non-lekku'd individual that was small and staticky and blue and sitting on the dashboard of the cheap speeder that he had arranged for the team for this mission. "We're here to steal uniforms of the Thyferran Home Defense Corps. As most of you already know, we need to get into a data vault on Thyferra to wipe out info on some bacta caches, which are gonna be forwared on," the small blue Zhu Yan raised a finger, "for profit," because he didn't want people to think him altruistic, "to some needy folk out there. But to get in, we need to look the part."
The building the speeder was outside was a big grey thing, with plain grey walls and plain dreary grey windows with a grey front door and the words 'BIG HOPE LAUNDROMAT, CLEANING YOUR CLOTH FOR BIG YEAR' written above it by someone who probably couldn't speak Basic. A stunning display of post-modern brutalist architecture with none of the heavy metal that implies, and probably the biggest laundromat in twelve systems.
"One more thing. Please try to steal more than just Thyferran uniforms. If people do a stocktake afterwards and realize that it's only those things missing, the Thyfes are gonna know real quick," explained Blue Yan. "So go in there, have fun, shoot up the place, whatever. It's Bestine. No one cares." And with that, the blue winked out.

Hex is smoking, because he always is, and using present tense, because eat it Yan. The beloved flowered duster was left at home, though it's hard to say whether it's because Hex decided this mission actually called for heavy armor, or because he was afraid if he brought it to Big Hope, somebody might launder it. "I wasn't paying attention to any of that," Hex admits after Yan winks out. "Do we have anything like a map or any idea what kind of security forces are at a laundromat? Why would we be shooting it up if there isn't security? Are we just shooting launderers? Laundresses? That's depressing as hell. KASIA! Babe! See if we can launder money here, ok ka."

"I care. What if this is some kid's first summer job or whatever?" Is it even summer Darius? The Captain looks over his Theedarms. Time to try out this heirloom. "Like I'm sure at school they'll be the belle of the ball with a sweet story like this, surviving our attack. But I'll feel real bad if they get hurt. Maybe I should finally try out this 'stun' setting my weapons have." He says with a smirk as he throws an arm around Vasani. "Look for some cute dresses yeah? Maybe some different color vests. I need more vests."

Vasani's head is bobbing up and down, listening and mentally counting every time the word 'laundry' or some variation of it is used between these conversations. She's confused already. "But Hex... Why would ya wanna clean yer money?" She asks, totally lost. She's wearing her hidden armor and has a blaster with her, but also is unsure of the need for armor and weaponry for stealing someone's dirty clothes. "We gotta get more than uniforms though... anyone know what kinda... laundromat... this place is?" Add another one to the list. "Ya think they got fancy clothes 'r anythin' cool? Or like... they have uniforms so is it just like a business people laundromat?"

Dosk has a cigarra in his mouth as well. He nods as he pays attention his datapad more for a moment before looking up. "Jacking some uniforms and some dresses for Hex. Got it" He says, looking up finally as he leans up from the bulkhead.

"Everyone should have a blaster stuck in their face violently at some point in their life." Comes the voice of Sajin behind the helmet of his power armor. "At least, That's how I learned not to piss my pants..." Because now he just shits his pants. The Hapan stands, "Anyways. I got yours all backs. You probably have a better eye for fashion than myself."

Were there maps? There were no maps. Yan hadn't seen fit (or forgot) to actually provide any. The building itself was foreboding. Ominous, even. That much grey in one place was prone to doing that. The speeder, presumably parked across two handicap spots because why not, was in a perfect position to get to the front doors. Speaking of front doors, they swung open, revealing a tiny, dreary office with an old Twi'lek woman (yellow, if you're wondering) sitting behind a creaky fake-wood desk because no one was going to go and get actual wood from Kashyyyk or Cardooine to make the place look better. In the back corner was an old aircon unit, wheezing like it was four hundred and on its last legs.
"Whaddya want?" the old woman barked out, looking up from her novel about forbidden love between an Arcanian and a B'omaar Monk to peer at the interlopers through half moon glasses. With a chain, too. "Oy, we've paid for the month!" she grumbled. "Frack off!"

"It's important to keep money clean, Vasani," Hex explains, either teasing her, or he doesn't know what laundering money really is either. He just knows it's something his wife enjoys as a fun and relaxing hobby. Kidding not kidding. "And Dosk, you think I wouldn't wear a dress? I can wear a dress. Reckon it's have to be plus size, but I can, I would, and I can still whip your ass in one." When the Speeder stops, sideways across the 2 handicap spots, he gets out and checks his weapons briefly before stowing them again. "Alright, since all of us are more or less disinclined to shoot up the laundry people /straight/ off, we're gonna do this smart." He hand wobbles, "We're gonna give it a try, anyway. It's us, so probably this is gonna blow fat chunks within eight minutes. Darius, Vasani, you're taking point and you're doing the talking. Specifically, you're doing the lying. Think of Yan. He's your spirit Yanimal. Think of him and his lies, get inspired. Me and Sajin are gonna shut up. Dosk, you can either talk or shut up depending on how bad you are at talking. What lies you all use, I don't care. It's an inspection, we're security; you're visiting important people, we're body guards, whatever. I don't care. Just make it sound good so we don't have to murderize an old woman." He shrugs, "Right away, anyway." Then Hex steps up, and politely opens the door for the rest of the crew.

Darius gives a shrug as he ties a bandana to cover his face from the nose down, and then wraps another around the top part of his head and hair. If they are gonna do some thieving, probably should cover the face right? Isn't like he has two huge lekku's sticking out of is head that are easy to ID. He is a human, and normal. Darius slides on some shock gloves, and then holds up his S-5 not exactly setting it to stun. Looks like Darius is ready to party. "Thanks buddy! I always feel safe when you're at my rear." He comments back to Sajin but then takes in everything Hex says.
With a sad essence Darius slowly holsters his pistol. Slowly takes off his shock gloves. And very sad and slowly removes his bandanas. "Yeah, talkin. Okay..." Did he say he DIDN'T want to shoot up the place? A puppy dog look is given to his fiance, suggesting /she/ will be doing the talking and he'll follow her lead.

Dosk makes race car sounds and a SKRRRT sound as he parks across two handicap spots. "You can beat me up, but you cant do that." He says back to Hex. Attaching his helmet and looking about. Tossing his cigarra into the street before followin the Twi'lek inside. His datapad humms relentlessly before he pulls it out and silences it.

"Hex's worn a dress before! Dare got it fer 'im the same time I picked out the Taun Taun!" Ahh yes this is the perfect time to reminisce about how they became a part of Defiance and infected them with the Taun Taun. "Okay okay, sounds good, I got this you guys." Vasani tucks away her own blaster before getting ready to get in her part. She wraps a scarf around her neck and puts on a big shaded pair of glasses. She steps out of the vehicle and makes her way to the front desk of the laundromat, walking with an extra little hint of proper-ness to her step. "Excuseeee me." She draws out her tone out in a very fancy and important sounding voice. "I'm here to pick up a /VERY/ important dry cleaning order. I'm afraid it's /VERY/ top secret, for one of my clients, those big time celebrity dancers. My guards and I will need to go pick it up ourselves. Absolutely NO ONE can see it before the big reveal!!"

Sajin trudges along with the others snickering at the banter. He waits at the back of the group, not saying anything. Shutting up like Hex suggested because him and the green Twi'lek were probably better and strangling people than they were interacting with them. He was a poor lier anyways. Such a good boy.

Where has Kasia been? Who knows. Was she in the speeder with everyone? Probably. She isn't here now, or wasn't, but the faint thump-thump-thump of hurried steps announces her return. The boots aren't light, ok. She's also wearing pants, and a knit type top with it, no obvious armor because apparently she's just not been shot enough in her life, and a blaster on her hip. "Oh good," she moves up to Hex while others take point to do the talking. "No one is dead yet."

"Uh huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh," said the old woman Twi'lek, looking at Vasani and probably thinking that she was much prettier than Ve is now when she was her age and not an old crone. "And here I was thinkin' you all looked like that codswallop of a protection racket down in the big city," she said, her eyes discerning, and judging. Still, Ve had made her point. The old woman looked behind the motley crue to a collections table behind them, which was empty (thanks, +chance roll). Well, that made her job a lot easier. "Well, it's not ready yet," she grumbled, adjusting her glasses and opening her saucy novel back up. "You're going to have to wait." And just like every receptionist that was far too over their job, she was done for the day. It was already ten in the morning.
Behind the closed doors at the back of the room that have been there the entire time I swear and were not forgotten about came the sounds of an argument in a non-Basic and very slave-master-like language. Also the sound of machinery, so that's probably where the main laundry room was lurking.

"That's what I keep you around for, ai'jou," Hex promises Dosk when they careen into their handicap spot. He sees nothing wrong with this parking. Why would the spots be so big if they didn't want you to park that way? "You're very handy!" He does seem legitimately pleased with the driving. It's cool driving. It probably gave them heaps of credit for being bona fide celebrity attaches, that style! Once in the foyer, he hangs around the back of the group with Sajin, looking bodyguardly, frowning a little at the sounds of the argument but unable to discern its meaning since he's a space racist who doesn't learn other people's languages if he can avoid it. He seems confident in the Talking People's ability to talk them through the doors to the laundry facility.

Darius loves to joke. Like the time he totally said flowers he bought were actually a salad, cause Hex started eating them anyways. But when it comes down to lying when it counts? Not the best. So he just shuts up and keeps his hand close to his waist and holster. Vasani seems to be doing fancy designer rountine and he is fine just being a bodyguard in this situation. A bodyguard that is her secret lover while her husband is away on Kuat for business. Cause of course they do backstory.

"I got this" Dosk says as he exits out the front and makes his way around the back, looking around and eventually finding an open window. The Codru'Ji makes use of his four arms to climb up and make a grand entrance, but slips on his first jumping grasp, falling down flat on his back, knocking the wind out of him. Apparanly he's not as spider many as he'd like to be. "Having issues here, carry on" he radios"

Vasani doesn't miss a single beat as the woman tells her and the group to wait. "Oh no no no, you SEE Darling." The blue Twi'lek waves her hand in the air before swinging the scarf around her neck. "That's the THING!" Vasani leans in on the desk and slightly lowers the glasses to look over them at the woman behind the desk. "Nobody else can see this clothing, you see. It is TOP secret. They are holding it in the back for us to come pick up, they would NEVER leave it out here with the others! We will absolutely NEED to go back there and get them before the show."

Sajin crosses his arms over his chest like a bi bad dude. Like Vasani' and Darie's bouncer security guard. Manly man man of doom and such. You got competition Jedi Arny.

Kasia is near enough that she can hear the shouting, brows furrowing a touch at the sound of the language. She hates Hutts, so even their language is something she dislikes, but she understands it too. "Someone isn't very good at their job," she remarks in a low voice. "Who puts red in with white? I think the order, or... well maybe the government who works under them now, is going to get back pink shirts."

"SIIIIIIIGH." Did she just say sigh? The book was snapped shut with a thump, and the old Twi'lek got out of her chair to give young Ve a proper stern talking to. "Look, young lady. You remind me of me when I was your age. Arrogant, vibrant, entitled, couldn't keep my hands away from a bodyguard. Yeah, I see you two." She glanced over at Sajin, of all people, judging him, and pursing her lips and tilting her head in such away that said 'Eh, not bad'. "There was this one gentleman from Coruscant, my god he was like a machine. Four hours." She held up a hand, extending four wrinkly manicured fingers. "Four! I couldn't walk for days! My poor tailbone has never ached more, and I'm sixty-eight now!" There was a point here but the rambling had kinda taken over. Elderly. Gah. On the plus side, Ve currently held the ENTIRETY of her attention.
On the other hand, things went quiet for a moment in the laundromat around about the same time as Dosk hit the ground. The argument involving fornicating mothers was dropped for the time being, replaced by a single foreign query and semi-hushed statements. He hadn't gone unnoticed. And now there were footsteps and the sound of machines dying down.

"Dosk, wait, where are you go --" Dosk is out. Hex watches this, mildly alarmed, but lets him go and holds position with stupid sexy Sajin. Talk talk talk, c'mon, when's this talking going to result in DOORS OPENING? His lekku twitch impatiently, and then... ah, a moment of silence. Is that good? Is that bad? Hex speaks into a wrist comm as unobtrusively as he can, "Doooooosk?" It's a multi purpose inquiry. Are you okay? Are you in? Are you dead? Hex is for the present time mostly ignoring the elderly lady Vasani is talking to. 4 hours? Yeah, sounds like fiction to him.

Darius is for sure thinking how rough a stun blast would be for this old Twi'lek lady. Broken hip? Heart attack? Lekku that falls off? All things that can be solved by modern bacta of course! At least in his mind. But he too, is now bored and just wonders away humming a nice little jizz-jazz tune as he puts on his shock gloves. Wonders right in through the doors they are suppose to go in without a care in the world, putting on all his bandanas like he had before they got in.

"Oh do I?" Vasani asks of the woman, totally fishing for more information. On one hand, yes it will help. But also Vasani is just interested in this lady's stories. Vasani does a little 'point point' motion with her lekku behind her back, gesturing for the others to sneak in the door past the lady. Vasani meanwhile loops her arm around the lady's arm and places her hand over hers, totally casually leading her to look the other way and continue talking to her. "Well these boys you see, well, a woman has her needs. But for four hours? DO tell me more, darling! I MUST know ALL of the details!" and another subtle 'POINT POINT GET IN THERE YOU GUYS' motion happens behind Vasani.

"Uhh yeah, just ended up slipping in some hobo shit." Dosk says back to Hex after a period of silence as he gathered his sense of pride after the epic fail. He tries one more time. Reaching a bit higher then slipping and falling down again with a loud thud. "I guess the back isn't an option." He says on his back. Rolling over and opting to head back towards the front entrance after doing so.

Sajin looks over to Hex and gives him a look, his lips pressed together like 'it's no big deal, bro.' He even moves his hand back and forth, palm flat to emphasise the point that Dosk was probably okay and that it wasn't not thing. The Hapan looks back over towards the secretary, raising an eyebrow. Turning to Hex, he shakes his head whispering. "I mean... I thought like two minutes was good." He shrugs.

"They heard you," Kasia remarks over comms from her position somewhere nearish to Hex and Sajin, but still close enough to catch conversation that's taking place. "They think it's food, or thieves, but then rightly pointed out that no one would want to steal from a laundry place. Because no one sane would." Which is why they're here, they're all crazy.

The laundromat was not a laundromat. Well, actually it was a laundromat, but it looked more like a factory. This was real heavy duty industrial grade laundry they were doing here. Clothes moved around on conveyor belts, churned in giant water tanks, pinned up next to fans the size of the Mayhem's cockpit, pressed under huge industrial-grade steam dryers, and coming out the other end so sparkly it's a miracle they didn't possess an ethereal glow to them. Oh and there was a small basket of pink uniform shirts next to another basket of dark uniforms that were clearly First Order in cut and design. Evil may kick kittens and kill orphans, but the laundry still needed to be done.
The people inside were a smattering of individuals, all in yellow jumpsuits with the dreary grey text of BIG HOPE stenciled on the back. Thankfully, they were looking away from where Darius was entering, and looking towards the elevated window where they had just heard a second thud.

"Honestly, what the hell!" one of them, a tall Gotal, was ranting. Maybe it had set off his sensory cones or whatever. "I definitely heard someone climbing the walls!"
"Could they be here for the sandwiches?" a short Klatoonian asked.
"Oh my god shut up about the sandwiches," said a world-weary Nikto standing next to him.
They were all very engrossed in their argument thanks to Dosk's epic failures at a stealthy entrance, allowing Darius to get a good angle on what was going on. Store rooms? They weren't here. Probably at the back.
As for Vasani, WELL, the stories being told to Vasani are so detailed, so outrageous, so lewd that the poor girl has probably had her own definition for 'kinky' shoved a kilometre to the conservative end. Bleach as a beverage wouldn't wipe the eldrich knowledge pouring into her mind, so invasive it was. The stores about four, five, six, seven, etc, and the contortions and the positions, and the locations especially, would haunt her dreams for days, weeks, months to come,

After dusting himself off and scraping the hobo turds from his boots, Dosk makes his way back in through the front and rendezvous with Hex and the rest. "Had a phone call, sorry," Stating as they move further inwards.

"Just come back to where we're at, it's okay," Hex comms to Dosk, "We're going inside." The minute Vasani has her elderly love guru distracted and turned around, he heads for the doors that lead to the factory floor, walking at a brisk pace designed to brook no disagreement. If you walk fast and look busy, no one asks. Also, having a rifle helps with the people not asking. Sometimes. "I mean, two minutes ought to be enough for anybody," Hex agrees with Sajin, and then yanks open the door to the store room. A little too forcefully; he was clearly expecting it to put up some resistance. "Alright, everybody get in there and look for what we need. Thyferran uniforms first, decoy whatever else you want to steal after. Be quick, getting out of here is likely to be more chaotic than getting in."

Darius is just standing there watching the guys talk after looking all pretty with his bandanas. His fingers cracking a bit under the shock gloves, and he is just about to jump in on the sandwich convo when Hex strolls in. Might as follow the green guy right? Sliding into the room after him he moves over and just starts throwing things around. Tossing that over there, kicking that down over here, humming and mumbling some songs as he does. "Hey, is this what we are looking for?" He holds up one of the Thyferra Uniforms to Hex. "What about this? Can I have this?" The next thing is a pair of bright blue ass-less chaps.

"Oh.... Yeah....." Vasani says numbly, just staring out past the woman she's talkng to. Turn it off Vasani, stop thinking about it, think about something else... like cute little animals! Wait she did WHAT with a WHAT? Oh... oh goddess. Hopefully everyone has made their way past her. Now its just a matter of finding an escape for herself. "Well uh..." Vasani tries to speak up but apparently this woman had other plans and just spoke right over her. SO MANY DETAILS. TOO MANY. "Did you ever-?" Yes. Yes she did do whatever Vasani was just going to ask about. All Vasani can hope for is that her friends can find that stuff and get out of there as fast as possible. Hopefully they all walked in and super easily found what they were looking for... right?

Dosk enters late after his failed attempts at breaking in the back door, rushing in to meet up with Sajin and the rest as the search for clothes begin happening. "Oh, she'll like this!" Adding as he picks out some skimpy outfits on the racks. "Oh, thats good for her!" adding as he grabs some more. Its basically all lingerie he is grabbing. "Some good stuff here!" Eying a dominatrix outfit before snagging it up. "She'll like that" he adds.

"Darie... Darie... make sure to pull out your sack before you grab anything." Sajin says to him as he heads into the closet with Hex and Captain Fabulous. Get it... they're goin into the closet? Ha...Ha... "Make sure it's nice and full, nice and heavy. I can help you carry your sack if it's too big." The stupid yet overly handsome Hapan looks over the cloths presented by Darius. "I... I..." The stutter of confusion. "I don't know what ANY of this stuff is, Darie. I'm so confused." He picks up an article of clothing. It's a thong. "Like... who wears this?"

Kasia does something similar as Hex, in that she just strides by quickly, and like she belongs there. It's amazing the places you can go just by acting like you're supposed to be there. Once in the side room, she sets to work looking for the uniforms, but seriously there is some cute stuff here. She holds up a little kid jacket that looks like it's about Boon's side, then turns to Hex holding it up. Not quite a mini kid duster, but cute. Is she going to take it? Yeah, yeah she is. Who even needs the uniforms anyway.

"It must be nothing," said one of the workers before turning around and seeing... a convoy of heavily armed and armored interlopers just straight up sashaying through their factory floor like they owned the place. The workers stood there, slack-jawed at the ATROCIOUS security breach happening in front of them. Didn't they have a receptionist to stop just this sort of thing?!
"Did they just...?"
"Yeah, I think they did."
"Are they after the sandwiches?"
"Who just walks in like that?"
"Who cares? Get the blasters and call security!"
"Alright fine! Frack!"

With what appeared to be pre-rehearsed precision, the yellow jumpsuited workers broke out into a frenzy of activity, scattering around the floor to get into pre-assigned positions. Weapons came out, some holdout blasters, a couple of heavy blasters, and one guy had a cheap rifle. Taking up defensive positions, one absurdly buff Twi'lek walked into the middle of the floor in a stunning tactical mistake carrying a heavy blaster and a megaphone. "COME OUT, YOU SCHUTTAS, OR WE'RE GONNA FRACKIN' KILL YA!" echoed from the device, filling the entire room with his voice.
One man in particular was scurrying towards a blinking control panel.
Just to add to Vasani's pain, the response was, "Yes, and we did it SIDEWAYS too!" in the sort of quiet older woman telling secrets voice. She gave no sithspits about the chaos going on inside.

Hex rummages through some crates, but fails to find what he's looking for, until Darius finds and holds up the Thyferran uniforms. "Yes. That. Get all of that," he confirms, followed by a look of disbelief at the assless chaps. "Darius, no. Those pants are broken. They're not finished yet or something. Don't -- Kasia, what are you even doing? Boon has like two jackets! Why would he need another jacket?" Then, of course, all hell breaks loose outside, and Hex sighs, bringing up his rifle. "Well, shit. That was fun while it lasted. Try to use stun if you can, alright? It's a laundromat, for goddess sake."

"Sajin, baby, your sack talk has me all flustered. I found the uniforms, I'm sure yours is bigger than mine think you can take'em?" Darius says with a smirk and then looks over to Hex. "Cool, I'm taking them then. HEY SAJIN HEX WANTS THESE FOR YOUR NEW UNIFORM!" He toses the blue ass-less chaps to him, and then taking out his S-5. No one to fist fight in here, so I mean? Can't punch anyone with these gloves.

"Oh wow, that's really impressive. Y'know I bet your stories would be WAY better than that book you're reading. You should trash this lousy desk job and go become an author. I know SO many people that would love to read about these stories. I bet they'd even stock your books at Dasani's Jokes Costumes and Pleasures! You should SERIOUSLY look into it. Just go! Right now! The world needs to KNOW!" Vasani gets the woman all worked up before shooing her out of the laundromat and then silently making her way toward the door, taking her blaster out on the way as she hears the commotion inside.

Dosk pulls his Series III out and shoots mid sentence. The round landing hard. Causing him to second glance as he tucks the lingerie into his pants. He looks around. "Holy shit!" he laughs a bit. "You all should give up!" adding as he stuffs the panties in his pants, keeping the gun wielded.

Sajin looks to Darius, "I didn't bring a sack, I left my sack back on Drik... wait..." He eyes the assless chaps and shrugs, "I mean. I'll wear them under my armor but if that's what Hex wants then thats what Hex--" And then the megaphone guy comes on. Sajin, turning, peeks out from the closet pulling his DL-44 from his holster. He just aims it at the MEgaphone fool and lets a couple stun rounds go. "NO! WE'RE NOT COMMING OUT OF THE CLOSET!"

"There's nothing wrong with three coats," Kasia points out to Hex, but then people have noticed them. Let's be real fair here though, this group didn't do a lot to hide their coming in either, so it really was just a matter of time. She pulls the weapon off her hip and steps back to try and be as out of sight as she can be, but she doesn't start shooting anyone just yet.

The shot from Dosk rang out and clipped the orange Klaatoonian, running for the security panel, in the head. Unfortunately, the man died from a sudden and fatal case of missing brain. He collapsed to the floor like a sack of tubers, bleeding from the tiny parts of his cranium that hadn't been cauterized the whole way through. The workers gasped in surprise.
"Oh my god, Keh-neh!"
"You shot Keh-neh!"
"You bastard!"
"He had a family!"
"He was kind of a schutta."
"Oh my god shut up Dave you're such a prick holy sithspit."
"Kill them!" roared Buff McMeatFist the Twi'lek, kneeling on the ground and slurring from the stun-shot he'd taken to the gut. It was taking all his HEROIC WILL to prevent him from passing out right now. He raised his own heavy blaster pistol, his aim wavering, and fired.
Blaster-fire erupted from the accumulated grunts scattered around the factory floor, aiming in the general direction of the four-armed bastard who'd killed their sandwich-obsessed friend. Did any of it hit? Absolutely not. Defiance were entrenched. Trapped, but entrenched. Except for Vasani, who was sneaky hiding on the other side and had failed to attract their notice.
SPEAKING OF VASANI, "Oh, they're at it again? Well screw 'em. Mess with the wrong folk, this happens," grumbled the receptionist, tucking her things into a handbag that put Tarion's purse to shame and adjusting her glasses. "I quit. I'm out. Later gators," she rasped, heading towards the door, stopping and turning to say, "Call me. And your handsome bodyguard too. We can do the thing with the rubber Bith and the vibro-ax." And like that, bam, she was gone.

"If any of you wear those blue not-pants in my presence, I will kick your ass, fire you, and cry. In that order," Hex warns Darius and Sajin. Shots begin to fly, and he turns to look at his Main, but platonic, Ji. "Dosk! Stun, man, stun! You just killed a guy in the laundry! That's embarrassing for him, /and/ they're gonna have to re-wash anything that a fine spray of bloody mist got on. Have a heart man." He considers, "Unless your weapon doesn't have stun, in which case... carry on, and sucks to be that guy." He fires off a shot of his own, towards the large Twi'lek. There can be only one. Just kidding, he's missed, there's still two large Twi'leks.

"YEAH! ME AND HANDSOME ARE GONNA STAY IN THE CLOSET TOGETHER AS LONG AS WE LIKE! " Darius yells coming up near Sajin and then fires off a few shots as he peaks out. Yeah, don't worry Sajin, Darius has your back. With words or actions. He got you. "Does anyone ever find it weird that we talk so much when we are shooting people?" He just starts. "You know in holovids it happens all the time, but like you'd think we'd all try to focus more on shooting and not getting shot. Talking can be so distracting, and oh my goddess Hex you'd cry for me?"

Vasani gives the old Twi'lek woman a thumbs up. That lady knows whats up. After she leaves, Vasani silently makes her way in through the door. And clearly all of the focus and attention is on the rest of Defiance who are hiding in a closet for whatever reason. So Vasani can pretty easily pull a few shots on one of the guys that was coming toward them who had his back facing her. "eep!" she lets out a high pitched exclamation realizing she ACTUALLY hit that guy, not even just once but TWICE! She quickly tries to find a hiding spot behind some of the rolling laundry baskets, not that it'll provide any actual protection but maybe they just won't see where she is.

Dosk takes another pop shot which is less effective. Panties dangling from his britches and getting dirty as he slides to the side to avoid fire. "Oh, they're dirty now, adds to the value."

Sajin looks over at Hex, then to Darius, then back at Hex as he's behind the corner of the closet door keeping away from the incomming fire. "Right... okay. Focus." He takes a peak out, flinching as a bit of lazer fire impacts the wall near him, sending sparks and such. He sees the guy he sort of put down shooting from a prone position with his big old gun. So he aims again and depletes his powerpack with one last shot to the big fellow. "Okay... so that should help a bit." He ejects the pack and works on reloading another one.

Kasia has that little coat tucked beneath her arm as she continues to duck back, trying not to draw too much attention to herself. The trouble is that she also doesn't have a great view of the people everyone else is fighting, but it's fine. It's fiiiiiiiiiine, everyone else will take care of it. She fires, it misses, she stunned the heck out of some towls though. Take that, towels! At least it wasn't anyone she knew.

The Gotal, he of the angry horns and furious at whatever the hell the noise was outside, hadn't put two-and-two together before he was shot in the back and went down, clocking his head on a safety rail. He'd be alright, but he'd wake up with a hell of a hangover. The buff Twi'lek started laughing when he saw Hex, seeing the man's size and saying, "Oh, no, I'm the biggest o-" before Sajin just blew his load straight into the guy's mouth. Ew, Sajin. Ew. Buff went down, dreaming of fat Twi'leks in assless chaps and things that would probably make Vasani perk up after the filth she just had to endure because honestly it was far tamer.
"Du-hg just got shot in the back!"
"What?!"
"I SAID DU-HG JUST GOT SHOT IN THE BACK!"
"Holy sithballs!"
"Frack that, Kresjon'sahn just swallowed a blaster bolt!"
"HOLY SITHBALLS!"


The four remaining workers split their attention, one turning to the suspicious crate of clothes and firing a bolt into it but missing the blue Twi'lek hiding behind, the other three raining blaster bolts into the storeroom again. They'd adjusted their positions to get a better angle, at least. One of them landed a shot on Sajin, and yelled, "OH MY GOD THEY'RE GODS OF WAR!" a pause, then, "SEXY ONES!"

"I can't believe we're having a shoot out in a laundry, on stun," Hex grumbles, as he fires at one of the four remaining mooks. This time it connects. "This is the lamest shoot out we've ever had, and we've had some kriffing lame firefights. Is there any back door out of this storage room, or are stuck going out the way we came in? Don't lose track of those Thyferran uniforms, ok ka, that's the whole point of this. Exasperated, he shouts back at the enemies on the factory floor, "You call this war?! This isn't war, you misbegotten sloppets! At best, at BEST, we are Gods of Scuffle right now."

Darius holsters his theedarms and looks down to the shock gloves. These guys are just workers right? He does feel bad kind of shooting them and all. Though he does have to test this new equipment he has. So giving a shrug he charges out. "I AM NOT A HOUK!" He screams, as he has been trying not to use anyone's names here ok ka? He sends a punch into the side of one of the works head, and goes down tryin to 'sweep the leg' with his next attack.

Vasani lifts her blaster up and just goes to shoot at whatever. Since she didn't look at where she was shooting though, she didn't hit any of the guys. "EEP!" She exclaims again. Okay Vasani. Deep breath. She slowly just barely peeks her eyes up over the edge of the landry basket. Oh and Darius is beating one of them up, great. She takes aim and shoots at one of the remaining guys, hitting him in the back again.

Dosk fires off as he leans down, his shot firing wide, hitting a background object like an explosive turd in a bowl. Vasani's hit warrants a slight cheer, before continuing on his mission.$r

Sajin gets clipped in the shoulder as he's reloading his DL-44. He double takes as the shallow smoking hole that's probably just leaving a contact burn. "Hey... That's. That's just not nice..." He continues about reloading his pistol, keeping stock. "Keep up the fire." He encourages the others.

"I don't know if this is the most embarrassing fight we've been in," Kasia counters what Hex is saying, but if she has a suggestion of things that are worse, she doesn't share them just now. "Can someone please just shoot that last guy?" she asks over the comms. "And has anyone actually found the uniforms? We need to get those if we have, and then get out of here, we have no idea if there are more people coming and I really don't want to keep shooting at... laundry people."

"Honestly you kinda look h-URK!" grunted out the Nikto worker as he copped a fist to the head from Darius. Already off balance, the leg sweep put him ass-over-tits on the ground, unconscious. Clearly he wasn't having the best day. The Barada, one of only two remaining workers, yelled out "STE-" before he took a stun bolt to the chest that took his breath away (<3 Hex) and another from Dosk that took him out of commission. The Ishi-tib, scanning around in a near panic, took Vasani's blaster bolt in stride. And by in stride, we mean falling to the floor unconscious.
The room went quiet for a minute, smoke and the stink of ozone filling the air, as the last guy left took stock of what was going on. "Keyth?" called out a human-like voice. "Steey? Steey Vin?" No response. There was a pause, then a muted, "Bahb?" Still nothing. Then, "Y'know what," said Dave, the Human, and the only one still conscious, "forget it. Forget it!" There was the sound of a blaster clattering to the ground as he emerged from his hiding place, hands in the air. "You want the money, take it. It's in the back of the store-room. The Bestine Four, don't ask, don't pay enough and I don't want to end up like Keh-Neh."

"You know what, stop. Just stop. You're embarrassing yourself," Hex informs the remaining goon. "It's stun, ok ka! It's stun! The worst you're gonna do is throw up some breadsticks! But if you want to make a big deal out of this, fine. FINE. Woe unto you, human scum, you have been weighed, measured, and found wanting; you have been judged, your annoyances exceed your merits, your penance comes pitiful, it comes late, your repentance is lamented unto deaf-ass ears. Woe unto you, little human, for you have come into the unholy fury of the Gods. Of. Scuffle." Then he fires, shoots, knocks the dude backwards and out cold. With the guards disabled, he lowers the rifle and twitches his lekku in annoyance. "Right. I'll get the uniforms. You all get whatever else you can't live without. Somebody get the money in the back. You got five minutes, then we roll."

"They call me fists of furr-Wait Hex, did you just call that guy human scum?" Darius says stopping from punching a guy he already knocked out and moving up over to the Twi'lke. "Hey, Munchi-Mooshi, you aren't gonna say any racist things at the wedding are you? I already have to worry about the Mandos being all /Mandie/, ok? Do I have to worry about you too?" He lets out a big sigh. "I'm totally wearing those chaps now buddy." And goes to help get the uniforms.

Hex will definitely say something racist at your wedding, don't worry.

Vasani's already got lots of cool clothes, so she doesn't bother looking through any of this stuff. Plus if there IS something cool, Darius would grab it right? (Hint: he wouldn't. He would just get assless chaps). Vasani rushes to the back and grabs that whole safe of credits. "We all good?" She asks of everyone else, looking around at them for a moment before making her way back out of the laundromat and back toward their ride.

Sajin checks the charge on his blaster then holsters it, stepping out of the closet and towards the exit. "Anyone got a bacta patch for my arm. It stings, like really bad." HE hisses a pit as he touches it slightly. "Stupid people trying to kill me."

And so concludes the great panty raid of Bestine IV, one of the better ones because it only ended in one person dead. Defiance achieved their objective, to make off with some Thyferran Home Defense Corps uniforms, and the only injuries they suffered were a blow to Sajin's pride, some disgust and frustration for Hex, and far too much information about an old Twi'lek's 'adventurous' youth. Not only that, they made it look like a simple smash and grab. At least that's what the witnesses (when they awaken) will say. Until they do stocktake that is, and find the uniforms, along with lingerie, swimsuits, assless chaps, a kid's jacket, and a normal pair of pants completely missing. But that shouldn't end in disaster, right?
...right?